That Floating Poo Was Far Too Symbolic! It's the Television Disappointments of the Past Year.

Looking back, we reflect on the TV landscape of the past year, a selection of shows stand out not for their excellence, but for their spectacular failures. From cringe-inducing spin-offs to bafflingly bad docuseries, here are the productions that had us scratching our heads or just reaching for the remote.

The 'Sex and the City' Sequel

How to start with this divisive spin-off? Burdened with dreadful scripts, painful character development (justice for Miranda!), and a paltry 71 seconds of beloved Samantha, the show fought to justify its existence. For a moment, as the final season started, it seemed as if it had at last hit its stride. Then came an episode all about Seema’s natural deodorant. No wonder the showrunner declared this would be the last season. It ended on a low point; the lingering shot of Miranda’s loo full of poo was simply too on-the-nose. Still, viewers certainly had a hoot picking apart every single “what on earth?” episode. And as Carrie – once again single – danced around her palatial townhouse to Barry White, who didn’t let out a little sob?

All’s Fair

‘Can Kim Kardashian act? Of course she can’t.’

But that was practically the least of this show's issues. The recipient of a exceedingly uncommon no-star assessment, it was hard to know where to start listing the flaws. The laughably leaden dialogue? The mind-numbing glorification of wealth and materialism? The almost deliberate procession of tropes? Acting so poor they felt borderline spiteful? Suffice it to say “all of the above” and never speak of this series again. Except, a second season has been commissioned, so we’re probably going to have to.

AKA Charlie Sheen

Given the restraining orders, domestic violence claims and parental failures, it’s reasonable to say Charlie Sheen has been a bad boy. Not you’d really have known it from this multi-part documentary which chuckled along at Sheen’s various bouts of reckless hedonism while struggling to tell us anything we didn’t already know. Rather, it felt as if this loose cannon was being pandered to, so any pity this show might induce should be saved for the people who have had to endure close contact with this charismatic but dismissive egotist.

The Supercomputer Drama

Of course we knew it was ridiculous from the outset: a drama about a AI known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either solve global crises – or annihilate all of humanity. We persevered out of pure admiration for its leads … but by the end, it felt like even they had stopped bothering. One barely cared when his character died, and the other ended up slicing Charlie with an axe … in super slow-motion. That's what you call giving up the ghost.

The Gangster Drama

Shady characters convening in empty boxing gyms? A certain band's Firestarter jackhammering away in club scenes? The late 90s called and demands its gangland drama back.

Actually, that is unfair on the crime shows of the late 90s. Many seem a bit dated now, but at least they didn’t suffer the embarrassment of having to indulge unconvincing accents. But there were many other problems. Mainly that it was just really dull; a dispute over narcotics territory between various London rogues which felt rather simplistic.

With Love, Meghan

Given the extent to which she grinds the gears of certain ostentatiously angry commentators, it’s temptingly tempting to applaud the Duchess of Sussex’s various forays into quaint homemaking as deliberate statements. But then you view them and are compelled to admit that in this case, they might have a point. It’s like watching a lifestyle catalogue animated; a meme for wine o’clock with ideas of grandeur; a parade of snoozing dogs, buzzing beehives, Hallmark platitudes and forgettable crafting “hacks” you’ll not remember instantly. All supported by immense, mostly unearned wealth. Ugh.

Victoria Beckham

There are obviously fascinating things to be discussed about both Victoria Beckham and her struggles with career, identity, self-acceptance. But for whatever reason, this three-part series opted not to say them. Instead, the experience was like reading a sales catalogue. She obviously has good reason to bridle at what she describes as her “stern” image. But sadly, she didn’t do herself any favours with this guarded non-event of a series.

The Inheritance

It had the potential to be the next big hit – except even more extravagant, with a glamorous star playing dead and a well-known personality overseeing her estate. What more could you want? As players battled it out, there was plenty of betrayal and squabbling. But the rules quickly became bewildering: it’s still too complicated to explain what exactly was happening. Even more disappointingly, we only saw brief appearances of the star via filmed videos. The show ended up smelling of a programme that was straining desperately to emulate something way beyond it.

The Lena Dunham Romcom

How do you succeed a show that defined a generation? The expectation was enormous for this starry romcom about Jessica, a rosy-eyed New Yorker who arrives in London with a shattered romance. The lead actress seized the opportunity by the horns and was joyous to watch, embodying Jane Austen levels of romantic notions. But it was all very slick and, paradoxically, was not enough. Plus, the sheer amount of celebrity friends involved felt icky.

The Sketch Show Return

Not good enough to be ‘uneven’.

Given the shrewd inclusion of talented younger comics, expectations were high. But unhappily, most of it didn’t land. A particular sketch was a one-note joke stretched to a dry pulp but repeated in every episode. One star seemed too ready to slip into a familiar irate mode. The writing room sketches, in contrast, simply provoked the idea that they should probably have stayed in there a bit longer.

The Twisted Tale of Amanda Knox

This retelling of the story of Amanda Knox was overseen by Amanda Knox and pretty much solely showcased the perspective of Amanda Knox. So, while there probably is an interesting drama to be made about the tragic 2007 murder, this was not it. The subject matter needed to be treated with care. Rather, the series laboured awkwardly to find the right voice, lurching from oddly jaunty, somewhat stylised farce to inevitably, real-life horror. Complex? Perhaps. A complete mess? Very much so.

Prime Target

We admire the star … but did we buy him playing the greatest maths genius in history, a man so smart he’s on the brink of a discovery that could ruin society? No! This international thriller about government agencies spying on – and eliminating – academics honestly got more farcical by the second. Formulaic nonsense.

1000 Men and Me: The Bonnie Blue Story

This uncritical portrait followed the online personality renowned for explicit exploits as she undertook her most extreme feat yet. What on earth would motivate her? What we craved was way more examination of her actual psyche, plus those of the men in the line. They could at least have interviewed the legendary mum who appeared to drag her son away from the queue. What we got was disturbing shots and zero interrogation of her infamy whatsoever. It's staggering to consider, the filmmaker has a teenage daughter too.